As I stood in the beer aisle at Wegmans the other night, attempting to craft a custom 6-pack, I realized something: Everyone, whether he or she admits it or not, loves at least one kind of fruity beer.

This realization occurred after witnessing three 20-something guys practically squeal in delight over Shock Top Raspberry Wheat.

So in honor of those guys — who I hope thoroughly enjoyed their Raspberry Wheats — and all the other closeted lady-beer drinkers, I sampled six different fruit-infused brews.

The first was Harpoon Brewery’s UFO Raspberry Hefeweizen. My initial thought after taking a sip of it was something along the lines of “Oh, my gosh. Yum!” This beer was so fruity, so deliciously raspberry, I felt like I was drinking juice that had a mild beer aftertaste. And at 4.8 percent ABV, it’s the perfect way for new drinkers to ease into the wonders of beer.

Next up was the Magic Hat Elder Betty. As a die-hard Magic Hat #9 fan, I thought I would be equally delighted by this Elderberry Weiss ale, but I finished it feeling unimpressed. Having never tasted an elderberry, I was surprised by the tart aftertaste. But in general, the beer was rather bland. If the only part that excited me was the mild innuendo printed on the underside of the beer cap, I’d consider this beer disappointing.

Since I’ve tried Shock Top Raspberry Wheat before, I opted for the Shock Top Honeycrisp Apple Wheat. After taking the cap off, I was immediately hit with an aroma reminiscent of a cider mill, so I got excited and took a giant swig. This was a mistake, since this beer tasted like I was actually licking the floor of the cider mill. My drinking mates inexplicably adored it, but I’d rather have real alcoholic cider.

One thing I did learn while drinking these beers is that I clearly don’t know what agave is. I selected the Blue Moon Agave Nectar Ale in hopes of something tropical and citrusy, but it actually just tasted like regular beer. Still, at 5.6 percent ABV, it’s pretty average in terms of alcohol content, and after I finished drinking it, I thought, “Hey, I could get drunk off these.”

Abita Purple Haze is another favorite beer of mine, so I was intrigued when I found the Abita Strawberry Harvest Lager. Little did I know that Strawberry Shortcake grew up and began brewing her own beer. Since strawberry juice is added to this beer after the filtration process, the fruity taste is intensely overwhelming, and at only 4.2 percent ABV, it probably wouldn’t even make Ms. Shortcake tipsy.

I had hoped to end on a positive note, but then I tried Peak Organic Brewing Company’s Pomegranate Wheat Ale. It was undrinkable. Its aftertaste was similar to that of chewing on a copper penny, and I definitely did not taste the pomegranate. The only use I can think of for this beer is to rid your party of unwanted guests; serve them this, and they’ll leave immediately.

Published on August 28, 2013 at 11:02 pm

Contact Avery: [email protected] | @averyhartmans