The Daily Orange

Man vs. College

Abstract:
College doesn't come with an instruction manual, but a few authors are trying to fill that void.

Whether you're a freshman who wants to start college on the right foot or a returning student who wants to make sure this year goes well, college guides can be invaluable....

Displaying 1 - 3 of 3

Ron Polomoff

posted 8/29/07 @ 5:52 AM EST

.(parody of DesiRatta)
S U Alma Ratta
***Go placidly amid the japs and jocks, and remember what peace there may be in drop/add forms. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with your roommate. Speak your truth quietly, and apathetically; listen to your profs, even the dull and the ignorant, for they too have their story.
***Avoid pre-law and pre-med students, they are vexations to the school spirit. If you compare yourself wit them, you may become vain and studious; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy the basketball games as well as your date.
***Keep interested in your own body, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your sexual affairs, for your roommate may interrupt you. But let this not blind you to what the pill can do; many persons strive for high ideals and everywhere dreams are aborted.
***Be educated. Especially, do not feign hard work. Neither be cynical about those who don't care; for in the face of all sacrifice and success they are perennial as grass.
***Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering your parent's money. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden cold spells. But do not distress yourself with getting a date. Many relationships are born of necessity and loneliness. Beyond the dining hall food, be gentle with yourself.
*** You are a child of Syracuse, no less than a chair or a desk. You have the money to be here. And, whether of not it is clear to you, your grades are unfolding as they should.
***Therefore, be at peace with yourself, whatever you conceive yourself to be. In the noisy confusion of campus life, keep peace with your ideals. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful University in September and in May. Be smart. Strive to learn. Rms 1973

Found behind basement wall in Hall of Languages- 2003

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