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Women & Gender | Occupy Valentine's Day provides different way to celebrate Hallmark holiday

Not a Barbie Girl

Published: Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Updated: Tuesday, February 7, 2012 22:02

When Occupy Wall Street protestors were evicted from Zuccotti Park overnight Nov. 15, the social movement was forced to shift its focus from a physical presence to a thematic mindset and alternative form of occupation.

This is where the "you can't evict an idea" slogan originally came about, and it's now playing a role in shaping a new uprising against Hallmark's favorite holiday: Valentine's Day.

Occupy Valentine's Day originated on Tumblr courtesy of Samhita Mukhopadhyay, executive editor of Feministing.com and author of "Outdated: Why Dating is Ruining Your Love Life." The Tumlbr blog serves as a space for individuals to express their disdain with all the clichés and problematic ways in which Valentine's Day is celebrated in our culture.

The Tumblr consists of images similar to the original 99 percent movement — men and women are holding signs that articulate their own stories about why they're occupying. Some signs include statements like, "Who needs Valentine's Day when boxed wine and insta-Netflix are already made available 365 days a year?"

I've never been a big fan of Valentine's Day, regardless of my relationship status — not because I don't like candy and not because I don't believe in love. My real problem is the commoditization of love that benefits from capitalist gains and the perpetuation of traditional and limiting gender norms.

After spending countless years in search of alternative ways to celebrate Valentine's Day, I owe Mukhopadhyay a debt of gratitude for spearheading an Occupy Valentine's Day movement. It's the ideal solution for critical thinkers and social change advocates, and it is an especially viable option for college students who may not have the time, cash or belief systems to support a contrived version of romance.

I am occupying Valentine's Day on Feb. 14 because I refuse to participate in a holiday that fails to include a wide variety of individuals who are all capable of love but don't fit the traditional heterosexual expectation and norm reinforced by greeting card companies.

I'm occupying because I value the authenticity of love and the role it plays in my life. Love is deeply rooted in all things and every single emotion — love is even necessary in order to successfully hate.

It's responsible for inspiring passion in politics and social change and is also integral to our personal experiences and livelihoods. Love is too meaningful an emotion and tool to make a mockery out of it.

I am occupying because I want to demand more out of Hollywood than a quintessential Nicholas Sparks movie released for the sole purpose of profiting couples who don't put in enough effort to be original.

Valentine's Day is expensive, and it'd be nice not to worry about spending money on overpriced greeting cards, stuffed animals and candy. Even the Vagina Monologues has an admission fee.

I'm occupying because I don't need a holiday that comes around once a year to tell the people in my life that I love them. I can send them handwritten notes and sentiments of affection any day that I damn well feel like it.

I'm occupying because it's a pretty kickass declaration in support of feminist ideals that aligns themselves with anti-corporate greed messages found in the 99 percent movement.

While the rest of Americans will be spending money on tired, exacerbated clichés next week and contributing to one of America's most commercialized and hyped holidays, I'll be doing one better by embracing Occupy Valentine's Day in my own unique way.

I invite you to join me.

Krystie Yandoli is a senior women and gender studies and English and textual studies major. Her column appears every Wednesday. She can be reached at klyandol@syr.edu or followed on Twitter at @KrystieLYandoli.  

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9 comments

Anonymous
Fri Feb 17 2012 10:57
Checked the SU course offerings and found a minor in Logic in the Philosophy Dept courses. Guess Rick F. is wrong.
Anonymous
Fri Feb 17 2012 10:25
If you are right, Rick F., and Logic courses aren't offered anymore, that would why the huge number of logical fallacies are found in your writing and in the reasoning skill (or lack thereof) of today's students.
TL; SHR (too long; shouldn't have read)
Sun Feb 12 2012 00:12
Good lord, Rick...never have so many words been used to say so little (so little with a rational basis, at least).

You've introduced a lovely array of words to this comment section. That array includes unnecessarily harsh words and an accusation of illiteracy, more one-sidedness than you rail against, and - as a whole - evidence of a personality that most of humanity would find overzealous and annoying. Most unpleasantly, you postulate (without citation nor a chain of reasoning) that, but for the author's specific character subset, myriad social reforms from emancipation to female suffrage would not have come to pass.

I feel compelled to type as much as you did (thank you to xkcd: Duty Calls ["There's someone wrong on the internet!"] for expressing how I feel), but why bother - your writing speaks for itself for both those who agree and disagree with you.

May you find happiness in your life and beliefs. Also, may I never encounter you in real life - one of the few things worse than reading your verbal vomit must be listening to it in person.

Rick F.
Sat Feb 11 2012 16:46
In your definition of classes that deal with "logic," are you referring to those that lack any sort of questioning of the world around you? If you are, I suggest you go to American University or another right- winged conservative collegiate environment where the "good 'ole boy" opinions are born and bred. The definition of logic is going by a system which has been proven to work for those who have made it so. I would say that if it is logic you speak of, I would agree with you that this girl does not have it. If those in history used logic to govern their ideals, there would be none of those with the courage enough to challenge the situation of their lives. I don't believe that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. had much "logic" when he marched on Mississippi amid fire hoses, church bombings, and death threats. I don't believe that Mahatma Ghandi had much "logic" when he marched for Indian civil rights in the 1940's. They were both assassinated for their "illogical" views. I finally don't believe that this girl is writing with much "logic" as to challenge the misogynistic world in which we live in with articles like this challenging people to love on all days of the year, rather than on one day bred out of Hallmark's idea to sucker people into spending money on one particular day for the one they love. While you may not believe that she is writing with the same "logic" as those around you that are, I urge you to ask yourself what you believe in. Do you believe in standing idle while the world creeps along slowly in a cycle of relentless stagnation? While maybe not important to you, this girl is questioning the world around her and trying to have those willing to listen understand what her perspective is. Your perspective is one of hatred and fright. You can't take the idea that there may be women in this country that want to be equal. Many say that women are fully equal to men in the year 2012, mainly men, but inequality lurks under the surface in the fact that in the state of New York, countless women have been imprisoned in the last ten years because they murdered their husbands after multiple rape attempts, and that attempted rape was never brought into the conversation when they were sentenced to life in prison. Inequality still exits. This is why "PC schools" as you call them offer "one sided information" to their "brainwashed seniors." But what you fail to realize is that the information is not "one sided." If you were literate enough to pick up a book and read what the opinions of these women are, you would realize that all that they want is an equal world. They challenge the world where rape on college campuses is okay as long as the girl was drunk enough, or she said yes once before saying no five times. They want a world where injustices that stay hidden can be brought to the forefront. So no, this literature in which "individuals are subjected to unwillingly" is rather rallying for equality, not stagnation and just accepting the ways things are. What you are championing for in your comments back to me is not for a broad and open conversation, you are rallying for this girl to shut her mouth because it scares you. You don't want a diversity of opinions, that worries you too much. You don't want her voice to be heard because it means that maybe things might change. Well, Bruce, too bad. It is people like this girl that create change in this world, however small you may view it as challenging notions of Valentine's Day. This is a challenge for change. I still have yet to hear your opinion on the matter also, at least "Anonymous" offered an opinion of not opening one's mouth when you don't want to celebrate Valentine's Day. All that I have heard from you is that these wretched "PC campuses" need to ally themselves with "logic" which has been traditionally based in dark, smoky rooms of the nineteenth century where white men decided how the world was to be, devoid of the rights of many. If you can, without spelling errors this time, try to tell me what you believe. I would like to know, but frankly I doubt you have a convincing argument because once again, all you know how to do is hate. If you don't agree with this girl, tell her why, tell me why. Don't tell me that "logic" classes need to be offered. Is this the third century Greek university? Logic classes aren't offered anymore. All that remains is people challenging what they believe is unfair in our worlds. I believe this girl has done it well, addressing both sides of the issue. Now it is your turn Bruce, if you can.
Bruce S.
Sat Feb 11 2012 16:17
@Rick F: Rick, I guess I didn't understand. Were you accusing me of using an "assumed name?" I am using the name I've had since birth, so it is hard to figure out what you mean when you say that.
Bruce S.
Sat Feb 11 2012 10:55
@ Rick F: Thanks for asking. My definition of "brainwashed" has to do with individuals being subjected, willingly or unwillingly, to a relentless, flood-tide of one-sided information and opinions, a situation typical of many PC campuses and within certain PC academic departments. Books reflecting other points of few are not found in the required reading, and speakers who challenge the departments' bias are not invited to speak. Your response to my comments is to name-call: "naive" "hater" "coward." Your writing sound far more angry and hate-filled than mine. You then wrap yourself in a variety of historic causes, many of which I support, some of which I find problematic. All of which, is a diversion from the issue. Do they still teach courses in formal logic at SU? I suggest you take one.
Rick F.
Fri Feb 10 2012 19:49
Bruce, I would like to ask, what is your definition of "brainwashed?" My definition of brainwashed is someone who is so caught up in clichés and "how things are supposed to be" that they cannot see two feet in front of their face. These are the people that do not challenge anything in their world. These are the people that let others starve halfway across the world because if they are okay in the first world, things must not be so bad for those in other countries. The fact that this "brainwashed senior" is challenging something says something about not accepting the status quo, which you are so inclined to do. Accepting the status quo, which is presumably what you are rallying for Bruce, is something that keeps not just women, but everyone down. If there were not those "brainwashed seniors" as you so eloquently put it that were not concerned with challenging the status quo, there would be no voting rights for women, African-American ex-slaves, JFK's Civil Rights Act of 1965, Roe v. Wade, Brown v. Board of Ed 1954, or protest against any war. Am I going too fast for you Bruce? Maybe I should slow down because its obvious you couldn't understand or know any of the events I just quoted because its clear how incredibly naive you are to think that change is not important. So Bruce, keep going onto articles about things that actually matter to making a difference in a changing world, and bashing a "brainwashed senior" for her views that are actually doing something in this world under an assumed name. You're a hater "Bruce," and there is no room for haters in a world committed to change. If you didn't agree with this girl about her views, maybe you would actually challenge her opinion and offer one of your own. But that is too much for you though Bruce, you are a coward, someone who only hates, and cannot think for themselves. Next time you think about coming onto an article or internet source that you don't like, fine, you are entitled to your opinion, but think, rather than hate. You're a hater Bruce, we don't have room for haters in this world.
Bruce S.
Thu Feb 9 2012 08:48
Right you are, anonymous! But, what do we expect from a thoroughly brainwashed senior who is fearfully only a few months away from graduating with her head full of nonsense from the "women and gender studies" folks. Good luck finding work in the grievance industry and remember your ralling cry: "It's so unfair! It's so unfair!"
Anonymous
Wed Feb 8 2012 20:54
Your concept of occupying Valentine's Day appears substantially similar to simply ignoring it. Is it necessary to rail against a holiday in which you have no obligation to participate?

I would encourage readers who dislike the artificial nature and narrow conception of Valentine's Day to simply express their love in whichever way they find meaningful. It is not productive to dissect a holiday enjoyed by so many. If Valentine's Day isn't your cup of tea - for philosophical, situational, monetary, or any other sort of reason - simply live and love as feels right to you!







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